Monday, February 17, 2014

I've always loved this little motivational moment from Ira Glass, but this visualization makes it epic. Note the reference to American Psycho [*giant smile*].
This is the wall I've been working to break through. Or at least this is one reason I've been working on breaking through whatever wall surrounds me that not only keeps me from making what I want, but that keeps me from knowing what I want, keeps me distancing myself always from certain people so that no one is close enough to occupy the space I once, and for a very long time, reserved only for someone else. This is about art and it is also about love and it is about those things together and it is about them separately. In regards to art though, my issue isn't not being able to do the work to close the gap, it's deciding which work to do, which genre to pursue, which area of creation I want to produce from. Harder than doing the work, for me, is pinning down what that work should be. Some days it's writing, other days it's painting, other days it's design. These days when I ask myself who am I? I don't mean it in regards to identity. I've built an identity. I know who I am as a person, as a friend, as a daughter, a sister, a teacher, a student, a lover, a citizen. But I don't know who I am as an artist. And all of my mental energy lately goes toward answering that question. Really it's a mix between answering it and finding the answer to it. Sometimes you go to the mountain, sometimes the mountain comes to you. 

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